Friday, June 29, 2007

No cars, just slides

When we first heard about Jim Lupient Water Park, our first thought was: "Seriously? What's next?! The Denny Hecker Dodgeball Arena?" Of course, the very thought of a car-salesman-sanctioned dodgeball joint turned us into giddy fifth graders on a field trip, and we did think about calling up ol' Heck and offering up a business idea so bold it would likely shift the car-dealing paradigm. But then we decided to keep it close to the vest, and near our hearts.

Despite its name, Jim Lupient Water Park is loads of fun. (Someone would like us to say "carloads," but we will refrain.) It's right across from the Quarry in Northeast, and because of this, it is made to look like a quarry, that is if a quarry were made of foam boulders.

But the best thing about this city cool-off pool are the three large waterslides that come in three different colors and speeds. We like to think of them as banana, strawberry, and orange. True to form, banana is the fastest and slipperiest of all the fruits. (If comedy has taught us anything, it's also the slipperiest form of street debris known to man.) This, dear friends, is why "banana" is eight seconds of body-like-a-bullet pleasure.

Six bucks gets you in, which is like two schillings for a day of swimming, soaking, sunbathing, and sliding through fruity slides. We can't guarantee the slides taste as sweet as they look, but we can attest to their fun factor for all ages. In fact, we've found ourselves in line with, er, "carloads" of other adults, and the only thing we were ashamed of was saying "carloads."

Jim Lupient Water Park:

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